Echoing Memories

I echo Joey’s sentiment, and find myself back in New York City, missing Rwanda, and wondering how to apply what I’ve learned to my life back in the states. I sat in Fort Green Park this morning, processing my emotions and memories. I expressed them through a poem that I’d like to share. While our trip may be over, it is only the beginning of a new chapter in our lives: Shamilia, Ramy, Bennett, Joey, Rachel, Kristy, Micheal, Claro, and myself. This chapter will contain the spirit of praxis, in which we reflect on what we’ve experienced in Rwanda, and then apply that to our future work. I miss you Rwanda, and I hope to visit you again one day.

“Letter to Myself: How You Encountered Rwanda”

It is said that God spends the day elsewhere to work, in the night, he rests in Rwanda  -Proverb

Through a sliding van window as you spiral down a mountain, you see the clouds whispering to the hills, close, like two elders telling secrets. Let the incense scented air intoxicate your senses, and lean in to listen closely. Through the wind, you will hear years of stories–

Tales of old peacetime- when kingdoms ruled over a country united, when beer flowed and sacred cows chewed rain soaked grass–

Tales of the colonialists who helped spark the great darkness of a rainy season in 1994, when the sky could not stop weeping for its children… When the cries of the people were not enough, and the whole world turned around and shut its eyes.

But now, wait, you hear the clouds whisper words like: reconciliation, recovery, challenge, peace–

Like the turtles we saw, gently singing, crawling slow as patience, in the student’s folk tale play they performed for you.

Did you realize that a place like Rwanda would change your perspective, your life?–

Teach you how to love more openly, to see the power of applied theatre more clearly, and to mourn for a people’s history more deeply?

And when you returned to New York City with its smorgasbord flavor and frenzied buzz, charged like a lightning bolt–

Did you know that every time you saw a stranger, you’d want to say Amakuru–

That you would be followed by the memories of the smiles of the students and people of Kigali, Byumba, Kibuye, Nyanza–

That you would sing Wiriwa and Simbuka out loud as you walk the streets?

Rwanda is like dancing with hundreds of children,

It’s like the big breath of transition after you’ve had a huge cry,

Or like your heart overflowing with love in a way you never thought possible.

It is there, waiting for you to return like a mother with open arms.

The Journey Ends–and Begins…

This is Joey with a quick “morning-after return from Rwanda” reflection.

Arriving back in New York yesterday after nearly 24 hours of travel was definitely a culture shock.  The fast-paced nature of the city immediately jolted me—and as I sat in a crowded shuttle van on my way home from the airport, horns blaring and the busy cityscape unfolding before me, I instantly missed Rwanda!  Rather than becoming overly sad, I tried to find a sense of inner quietness and reflect upon my travels.  I tried to channel the peace, joy, and love I had felt in Rwanda over the past several weeks.

I recognize that this will be a goal—as well as challenge—of mine—and my CUNY colleagues and collaborators in moving forward.  Trying to take all that we have garnered and apply it to our lives here will be a process that will not always be easy, yet it will be one that has the capacity to move us towards a fuller sense of humanity and strengthen our commitment to change.

Last year in Rwanda, my good friend and colleague Melanie Willingham-Jaggers taught me—and the KIE students— a song by Sweet Honey In The Rock that contained the lyric “We who believe in freedom cannot rest, we who believe in freedom cannot rest until it comes”.  After my second journey to Rwanda, this message continues to resonate for me.  I am excited by the potential of theater as a universal language that stresses communication, builds knowledge, and plays a key role in the process of freedom.

As I sit musing and reading the blog written by my colleagues and collaborators of the past several weeks, I am feeling many emotions.  Above all I am GRATEFUL for our time in Rwanda—for the notion of “let’s be now”, a commitment to “know more than we know”, and the continued burning desire to fight for freedom for all.

While this journey has “ended” in terms of actual time, its impact will matriculate in many ways—I SO look forward to see how it unfolds…

Lots of different emotions are swirling at the Civitas hotel today, as we all prepare to leave Rwanda and return home or move on to the next step in our travels. It’s hard to end such a monumental trip, especially when it’s coupled with the anxieties of packing and flying.

Yesterday we had a wonderful day at Lake Kivu in Kibuye. We stopped for pictures on the three hour drive there, posing in front of the beautiful hills and fields of this country. I was lucky enough to get a window seat as one of my favorite things is watching the landscape as we move past it, observing the many forms that life takes in this country- people hard at work on the fields, kids playing in the grass, women walking with heavy loads delicately balanced on their heads, and animals roaming around.  Then we arrived at Lake Kivu. It is one of the most beautiful places I have ever been to- a large body of water surrounded by brush, forest, hills, villages, and even some scary looking spiders. It straddles the border of the Democratic Republic of Congo and Rwanda. We had gone to the western border of Rwanda in just a few hours, exemplifying how small this country is, yet so rich with history, culture and diversity. At the lake we relaxed in the sun, calmed by the rippling waters, and went on a mini hike on a path along the lake. On the path we ran into eucalyptus plants, dragon flies, spiders, flowers, banana trees, and some skipping stones that made their way from our palms into Lake Kivu. It was a relaxing, joyous day filled with reflection, jokes, sun and sea.

Before we headed back to Kigali, we were given some free time in the village and some of us walked up to a magnificent church rich with the history and tragedy of this country. This was a church where thousands of people were massacred during the genocide. Unlike the other churches we visited in Bugesara, this is a memorial church for those lost but also still functions as a church for worship. Inside were awe inspiring stained glass windows, shining and shedding celestial light on the people inside. Sitting inside this church where children were giggling outside reminded me of the life that continues after the tragedy that occurred here. This is the mixture of sadness and joy that exists in Rwanda. Many souls were lost here 18 years ago, and are remembered at sites throughout this country. This memory has allowed the Rwandese people to rebuild and look towards a brighter future, something that is evident in the joy and ambitions of the KIE students. Sitting in a church reflecting on these contrasts as a visitor is a strange thing. It is not my history and yet when I think of the events of 1994, I am overwhelmed with emotions- for the loss, for the devastation, and for my disappointment that my country and the international community in general did nothing to stop it.

As Ramy and I sat on a ledge by the church overlooking the lake, I felt enormous gratitude that I was able to come to Rwanda with my classmates and teachers and have had this learning and life experience. The KIE students and Kimasagara Youth Center volunteers have taught me so much about listening, communicating and living with an open heart. I am grateful to the Rwandese people that we have met or passed on the streets for welcoming us to their country with smiles and Murahos (hellos). I will miss the red dirt of this place rising up in the wind and I will miss hearing amakuru (how are you) from strangers.  As Jimmy, a KIE student wisely said a few nights ago, this is the land of a thousand hills, and the land of a thousand smiles. And we can only smile back at you, and say Murakoze Cyane (Thank you so much!)

Amohoro,

Rachel

Ntarama… Nyamata… Murabeho (Part I)

I spent yesterday morning in silence.  We visited the genocide memorials in churches at Ntarama and at Nyamata.  We reflected on those lost and the pressures and influences that lead up to this time.   The tattered clothing and tarnished remnants of the victims sat solemnly there, posing questions that Rwandese people are asked to answer every day since the end of the genocide.  Questions that we, visitors in this country, have only just begun to consider.  I felt the weight of my privilege.  Here I was, mourning events that I did not have to experience.

I am continually awed by the resilience of Rwanda.  The earth at these sites knows of what happened in these places.  It bore witness to every act, and still it grows lush, verdant, fragrant, around the memorials. Nature witnessed the tragedy, but it is not deterred.  So it is too with the Rwandese people we have had the privilege to meet.   While roaming the church at Ntarama the sound of a chorus of voices wafted through the main hall, a signal of how the church may have sounded before 1994 and a confirmation that people continue to lift their voices and their spirits in the genocide’s wake.

In front of the memorial were more stark and beautiful contrasts:  a group of young children running, laughing and cheering with one another.  And then a majestic elder mother, the first elder I have seen in my time in Rwanda, who sat to greet us as we scribbled our reflections into the guest book.

Considering this tragedy has challenged me to think about human nature and our accountability to one another.  Here in Rwanda, I am further developing my ideas about how my work can affect us as members of a global community. Theatre can ask us to critically examine one another and ourselves – essential components in building this ever-expanding community and avoiding reprisals of tragedies like that of 1994.

Later in the evening we had the privilege of bidding our hosts and friends farewell…more on that in Part II.

The Travail of Travel

I am grateful to my classmate Claro for sending our group an inspiring essay on travel by Pico Iyer. In his analysis on why we travel, he recalls that all of his meaningful journeys have involved hard work, which brings to mind the similarities between travel and travail (French for work). Yesterday (Friday), our group experienced the aforementioned analogy and I conclude this: the harder you work on applied theatre here the bigger the pay off. Our stay here in Rwanda is one of the richest journeys that some of us (and I would argue most of us) have experienced, and working to create AND perform a play in four hours yesterday only added to the awesomeness. So yes, did I mention we performed a play to an audience of hundreds of students that we created and rehearsed in ONLY four hours? WE DID! And we are incredibly proud, not only in our work, but in the effort the KIE and KYC students put in. In general, it has been wonderful to begin our work and (hopefully!) future partnership with the KYC. It is clear that they have a strong group of talented individuals who are already engaged in applied theatre work. I am eager to stay in touch with all of them!

The Morning: Our One And Only Rehearsal!

Our day began early after our lovely outdoor breakfast ritual at the Civitas. We created our scenes in the Little Red Riding Hood play the previous day, and came in ready to refine and tweak them. Bennett was my scene partner and we devised the beginning of the play in which Little Red is nominated to journey to her grandmother’s through the woods. In our process, it was important that we start to foster the leadership that is already very present among the KIE students. I worked with one student who I have been totally awed by. Her aim is to be a director, and her ability to synthesize our suggested directions with her own while translating in Kinyarwanda was awesome to watch. We could not have created such a solid, humorous scene without the help of the KIE students.

One, Two, Three, Action!

We took a van ride to a school in Gatsata near Kigali where hundreds of students were waiting for our arrival, some of them perched high atop trees to get a good view of the stage. After the introductory African rap lip singers, we watched the KYC perform a play that had created on the dangers facing Rwandan young people. It was clear that the heavy issues that would be considered taboo to perform in front of young kids in America were meant for all of the ages present. The show’s content was educational in nature and ranged from scenarios of young girls talking about the value of sugar daddies to the desire to take academic enhancing drugs. I’ve learned that sugar daddies in Rwanda have a different meaning than in the US. Here, they are men who offer to pay the way of the young girl or woman in exchange for sex, however, often these men have HIV and believe that their disease will be cured if they sleep with a virgin. Later on when I asked a KYC member why it was OK to talk about these issues in front of five year olds, he told me that the government has a strong push towards early education and intervention on these problems. The KYC also asked the audience to come up and participate by speaking with the characters while they were still in role; it was so interesting to observe!

After their performance, it was our turn to present our version of Little Red…What I noticed immediately is that the children were totally engaged. To give you a picture of the audience: they were gathered in a 270 degree angle along a steep hill. It was clear to me that we hooked them into the show with our concrete mime. What is that? Concrete mime is when actors personify intimate objects; in our case we opened the show as animals, we became trees swaying in the wind, cabinets that opened and closed, beds etc. We had two microphones to amplify the show that were passed around the many actors in one scene to make sure. Highlights of the play included some great repetition in the excuses given by the children for not wanting to go into the woods in the first scene, the personified flowers and woods changing position in the second scene, a tree morphing into a pack of hungry wolves in the third scene, Jean D’Arc as a scary wolf in the last scene, and the overall ability to use both English and Kinyarwanda throughout the show. All in all, our play was a success! In this case, success is measured by our ability to playbuild based on a folk story in 4 short hours and present it to a huge audience. While the show had small technical glitches, the most important part, for me, was that we set our actors up for success. They were not nervous, they had fun, and they seemed proud of their work.

The End: Joy And Dance

As we were on our way out, the school DJ threw on some tunes which the little kids immediately ran out and danced to. We joined them on the red dirt floor of the stage to dance. What I will never forget for the rest of my life is dancing after working so hard, hundreds of children swirling around us, singing every word to the pop music while holding our hands, and the plumes of dust being kicked up by the happy feet. In that moment, we were lost with joy: the joy of the people and children of Rwanda, with accomplishment, the embodiment of work and travel with the beauty of this country, the love the people have given us…I find once again that it is near impossible to capture in words.

This is Amy singing off with gratitude, love, and praxis.

The better to hear you with, my dear!

Today we continued our work at KYC.  On our day off, we have taken the desire of the KYC participants to learn about play building and planned two sessions.   During our work today, those plans continued to change and adjust.

I had the opportunity to lead an exercise entitled, “Stop, Go, Clap, Jump.”  To anyone out there who has the opportunity to lead theatre games or exercises, this one is a keeper.  We started by walking about the room and following simple commands (i.e. stop, go, clap, jump).  The game takes a twist when the words start to take on different meanings.  Stop becomes go.  Clap becomes jump.  Go becomes stop.  Jump becomes clap.  The exercise is a fun way to get the brain working.

The KYC students shared an exercise with us today.  This exercise was a modification of rock, paper, scissors.  The participants are divided into two groups.  The groups decide on a sequence of actions (Rabbit, Archer and Wall).  Once decided the groups show their actions and see who the winner is.  My team “lost” but had an amazing time.

We began our session working with a slightly adapted version of Little Red Riding Hood.  Our initial goal was to break up into four groups and create the story in four scenes.  Each group would create one scene.  We would take a couple of days to explore a multitude of play building strategies.  At the conclusion of our work on Friday, we would share our scenes and discuss what strategies were used.  During the break we were invited to perform this work tomorrow with KYC at a local school.  We had to accept the invitation and so we kicked our devising into overdrive.

In a half-day session (we started at 8:30 and finished at 1), we created images for each scene; brought those images to life, showed the scenes we have created and put together an opening sequence.  This is the type of thing that KYC wanted.  It is an opportunity to focus our work on the participants’ desires and needs.  It can be quite scary putting a play together in what amounts to two half-day sessions.  But if you don’t put yourself in challenging or scary situations, how will you ever learn or grow?

This evening has been filled with preparation for tomorrow.  We have a bit of an earlier start (8 AM) and head to the school at 11.  I am excited to see the work that KYC performs at schools.  They will present their original piece that they tour to schools here in Rwanda.  I am also excited to then jump on the stage and show some work that we (KYC, KIE and CUNY) have created in an obscenely short amount of time.  What a way to end our work here in Rwanda!

This is Bennett wishing you peace and praxis.

A different kind of 4th of July…

This is Ramy writing in the wake of the 4th of July holiday, a day which carries many meanings.

In Rwanda, we recognized a different kind of July 4th than Americans celebrate. Rather than proudly brandishing red-white-and-blue at a backyard barbecue, gazing at loud booming fireworks in the distance, we spent a significant portion of our day in silence.

July 4th also happens to be Liberation Day here in Rwanda, and this year marked the 18th anniversary of the end of the country’s tragic genocide carried out in 1994. Over a period of 100 days, from early April to July 4th, over 800,000 people of the Tutsi minority were brutally killed by people of the Hutu majority. With 1.1 million Tutsis living in Rwanda, the mass killings eliminated over 75 percent of the Tutsi population.

To pay homage to this monumental day, we students paid a visit to the Genocide Memorial Centre in Kigali. We showed up with a basket of flowers tied with a purple ribbon (purple represents grief here) that read: “Always Remembering Our Rwandan Brothers & Sisters.” We started our tour with a visit to an unsealed mass grave where we could place the flowers we brought and have a moment of silence. It was intense, to say the very least. With only glass separating us from coffins draped in purple and white cloths with crosses on them, it was a surreal experience to actually face what we had only read about in advance of coming to this country. Not surprisingly, a few of us got a bit emotional standing there, acknowledging the harsh reality of this terrifying chapter in Rwanda’s history. Through our silence and stillness, there was a peacefulness that came over me.

The Genocide Memorial Centre in Kigali is a stunning site. Outdoors, there are a series of sealed mass graves (giant concrete slabs) in which the remains of over 250,000 people are interred. Walking along those concrete coffins, reading the names of the victims on the walls, you can’t help but pinch yourself as a reminder that this was actually real. That something this unimaginable really did happen. That there are really hundreds of thousands of people’s remains just a few feet away.

Most of those killed have family members who are very much alive and who remember the horror of those 100 days as if it was yesterday. In many ways, it was. 18 years is not that long ago. I know I was in the 8th grade at the time and can remember hearing of mass killings in a faraway land called Rwanda.

There were also a series of gardens which offered many layers of meaning in their construction, the most obvious being the plethora of beautiful purple flowers planted within them. The first garden, the “Garden of Unity”, featured a circular fountain representing a unified Rwanda before the genocide (before colonialism). A stream from that garden spills into a waterfall which leads to the next garden below, the “Garden of Division.” This garden featured an explosive star as its fountain. Elephant statues sitting at each point on the star were facing out, turning their backs on the center of the fountain to symbolize the state of disunity that made the genocide thrive. The stream continued on to yet another garden below, the “Garden of Reconciliation.” In this garden, there is a fountain with a pile of rocks as its base to symbolize the building of a new Rwanda with elephant statues carrying cell phones symbolizing remembrance and communication about the genocide to future generations.

Indoors, in the museum portion, the walls telling the harsh truths of the facts about the genocide were hard to digest. It was a stark contrast to the serenity of the gardens outside. The walls told the history of Rwanda and what exactly led this once unified land down the road to multiple instances of genocide (the first was in 1959). What sits with me the most is how in pre-colonial times, Rwanda was a land (a kingdom) in which the people coexisted, unified by a common language and common work: cultivators and cattle raisers. It wasn’t until colonization by the Germans and later the Belgians that ethnic classifications were imposed on the Rwandans. The new colonial masters promoted the notion of Tutsi (15%), Hutu (84%), and Twa (1%) as distinctive ethnic groups in a way that had never been done before, thus creating internal conflict between the people and sowing the seeds for a genocide ideology.

The fact that the entirety of Africa was colonized by Europe and hacked into several pieces with false borders is not new information by any means, but to see what the long-lasting consequences of colonization are makes me think about how when we are taught imperialism in schools, it rarely comes with a critical view.

It’s ironic that we visited this place on the U.S.’s national holiday celebrating our resistance to British colonialism, but the U.S. is no less guilty of colonizing other people’s lands. What about the fate of the native people of America? Wasn’t that a genocide as well?

It is important to clarify that we M.A. students did not come to Rwanda to directly deal with the genocide and the national movement towards reconciliation after such a horrific history. We are here to share applied theatre techniques with the people so that they have the tools to use theatre to address whatever social concerns that they have. If the genocide comes up in the work, it must come from them. Not from us. That would only be another instance of Westerners coming in and imposing their agenda on the people. Applied theatre is participant centered and can be used for many different purposes. When I look at what has come up in the past week and a half with some of the drama students we’ve worked with, it is rarely directly about the genocide. The concerns we’ve heard the most often are about street children, abuse of women, police corruption, gambling and drug abuse, among others.

Though our work is not meant to directly address the issues of genocide, it is important that we know this dark chapter in this country’s history. It is a very recent chapter in which many of the people we are meeting are still closely related to. In advance of this trip, we all had to read Philip Gourevitch’s moving book, We Wish To Inform You That Tomorrow We Will Be Killed With Our Families, which I highly recommend to anyone who wants to learn more about this complex chapter in Rwanda’s recent past. The visit to the Genocide Memorial Centre concretized much of what was shared in that book. I am grateful for the opportunity to have had a lot of that information supplemented by actual images and artifacts and quotes and footage by the people that lived through it.

I would like to close with a quote from one of the walls within the memorial:

Genocide is likely to occur again,
Learning about it is the first step to understanding it,
Understanding it is imperative to responding to it,
Responding to it is essential to saving lives.
Otherwise “Never Again!” will remain
“Again and Again…!”